Cats.
Cats don’t do tricks for treats.
They’ll watch you beg for affection like a fool at the screen door, then decide whether your soul is worth crossing the room for.
They don’t cooperate with pigs.
They don’t sniff around vehicles.
They are not impressed by whoever’s knocking.
But they know.
Who fills the bowl. Who cleans the box. Who talks sweet when nobody’s watching.
Respect. Cats.